I’ve been home from my England research trip for six weeks now. My cottage writing table next to my fireplace is such a fond memory!
I was determined to carry on with my good writing and health habits as soon as I got home. I had felt so well in England, while also accomplishing so much writing, and it was important to me to carry those lessons home.
Since being home, I had some wonderful wins, and a few spectacular fails. As is usual in real life, the fails taught me more than the wins. It didn’t teach me that I couldn’t replicate my time overseas–far from it–but it sure revealed where my structure was the weakest.
Begin as You Mean to Go On
I was determined to do four things when I got home that I had decided were my biggest “wins” while in England. [See my ten blog posts with photos from October beginning with this one.]
- I would get up very early every day, by 5:00 a.m. I would start my day with my tea and quiet time.
- I would begin writing by 6:00, before talking to anyone. (I have it easier than many people here. My husband works nights, so he is asleep until 9:00 or so.) But I used to get that early when my children were young too.
- I would exercise throughout the morning, either with short walking breaks or five-minute weights routines or stretches. [I need it for my back and posture, but at the end of the working day, I just don’t want to do it.]
- I would go to bed early so I got a good night’s sleep before getting up at 5:00. I would get off ALL screens (including phone) after 8:00.
It was fairly easy to get up at 5 and begin writing by 6 for the first week. But it got harder and harder, which first surprised me. I had had no trouble for three weeks in England getting up that early without an alarm clock.
What Went Wrong? A Vicious Cycle
So I looked at calendar and my list of meetings and doctors’ appointments, and that was a big part of the problem. I had meetings and appointments several days in a row that took my prime writing time, and so I struggled to write in the afternoon which bled over into the evening because days are full of distractions and interruptions. I found very early that one hour of writing in the morning before talking to anyone was worth at least three hours of writing time later in the day. And because I am slow during the afternoons, it ran over into the evening. So, then I ate late, got to bed too late, and couldn’t get up at 5:00 a.m. anymore.
But what to do?!?! The doctors’ appointments were the important kind where they are booked up months in advance, and if you don’t take the available choices the receptionist gives you, you have to wait several more months. And I’m not in charge of the volunteer group I work with the most, so I’m not in charge of calling the times for the work days. (Our leader always wants them first thing in the morning.) So I fumed through a couple of those days as I wasted my best writing hours doing non-brain chores instead.
An Experiment With Boundaries (Done Pleasantly)
So I tried an experiment, just to see if I had more choices than I thought. After the lung scan I had, the receptionist needed to set up an appointment for me to see the results. Of course, her choice was at 9 a.m. When I asked for a later time, she said her next available choice was in February, three months away. (I was always an “automatic yes” before when faced with this kind of choice.) This time, though, I said that the February date was fine as I didn’t particularly care when I got the results. She said nothing, then went back to her computer and offered me a choice in two weeks for 3 p.m. Aha! (I have done this twice now with the same results.)
Boundaries With Helping Others
The first week I was home, I fulfilled both of my agreed volunteer times, but during all the sorting, packing, etc. I did for two mornings, I was thinking! I love this volunteer project, but I could do most of the work even brain dead. So when the leader called for the next morning meeting, I said mornings no longer worked for me. I offered to take the boxes of stuff home to sort in the evenings, or I offered to come to the work room at 3 and work for several hours. She said no. I said (pleasantly) that I understood her position, but I would need to resign and find another organization that fit my work hours better. Very short pause before she changed her mind and said I could take the work home, then bring it back some afternoon. Bingo again!
Home Health Habits
One more failure and fix: I also stopped exercising when I got home, resulting in some terrific backaches from sitting too long. Admittedly, the English countryside and Victorian buildings were such a wonderful enticement to get out frequently and walk. And coming home to Texas temperatures and cactus countryside wasn’t that appealing.
But I hunted for another system that would work for me and discovered a new book called Elastic Habits, which I will definitely blog about soon. The system outlined has worked for me to get back to the intermittent exercise I found so helpful when away. So, bit by bit, I am re-creating my English cottage experience in my Texas office (which looks like England now actually, with all my souvenirs and photos.)
Bring Home Your Retreat
Way too often, we give up on our writing retreat experience, whether one that lasts a weekend or two weeks. But with enough determination to FIND A WAY to replicate it, you can in so many ways. Find out what works best for YOU as a writer. Your body rhythms may recoil at the idea of working so early. That’s fine. This is just what I found worked really well when I had the freedom to choose my own eating/sleeping/writing/exercising schedule. Yours will undoubtedly be different.
But do your best to find and implement it. Don’t assume, like I always have, that you have few or no choices. Give your writing more importance in your schedule, and you’ll reap so many rewards, including loving your writing process again.